← Notes

Never Search Alone, Chapters 2 & 3.

Managing the Job Search Roller Coaster

  1. Job search is difficult for everyone — we all feel isolated in the process. Particularly poignant: this type of insecurity is deeply woven into capitalism and its “creative destruction.”
  2. Asking for help is one of the most important skills, though must be done in a way that retains independence. Do not ask for a job or put another in a position of implied approval of your actions. Done right, it becomes a joy for the person who you ask as well.
    1. I of course struggle with imposter syndrome, but what resonated most in this section was the anxiety of feeling like I’m supposed to know something already.
    2. Anecdote: Francesca asked me this weekend about when I learned to cook and I responded that I’m still learning. Would this have been as straightforward for me emotionally in the context of being a coach, product leader, or CEO?
  3. Cognitive empathy comes from being in someone else’s shoes, like mothers with similar-aged kids. This comes naturally through forming a JSC, assuming that all have some commonality in their searches.
    1. I feel super grateful to have joined a JSC, and wonder how much I can explore various possibilities or if a search needs to be more directed.
  4. He spent a good deal of space discussing ways in which we can have blind spots to our own patterns, and that a JSC can help point them out. For the amount he explained the theory, and brought in Daniel Kahneman, I didn’t fully understand the point here other than that a community of peers can help you see yourself differently and that you can see your challenges through their eyes.
  5. He closed with the concept of an “Orangutan Room”, which is just to say that allowing one to talk aloud their own problems, to be witnessed in them, is a great gift. Yes — I believe this is one of the most valuable contributions a coach makes!
  6. Next steps
    • Look at Katherine Graham’s Personal History
  7. Chapter 3 simply presents where to find more resources, tools, and templates on phyl.org. It reiterates the importance of a JSC support group, and cautions agains “boomerang” jobs or skipping the Listening Tour — both potential reactions to anxiety that may spur one to move faster and skip / miss important pieces of value.